Dirty Bird Pictures' "The Porne Ultimatum"

Chasen Porne.

I love it. It doesn't get any better than that.

Mike Donner does a fine job of bringing to life his very clever and tongue in cheek (as well as a few other places) script with The Porne Ultimatum, the latest from Dirty Bird Pictures, a division of Active Duty. What began as a bumpy start for Dirty Bird (our past reviews have been less than favorable) is made up for here at times with some truly hot moments that make this the first "must buy" from the blossoming new studio.

Newcomer Kaden Saylor proves himself to be an absolute star both as an actor and a sex performer, featured in three sex scenes throughout the movie, the first of which is opposite Brent Corrigan.

Saylor is truly a beautiful specimen of man -- I mean, his body is just ridiculous perfection -- and Donner is so focused on capturing that that Corrigan seems almost a bystander in the scene. While the camera pays attention to every ripple and dent of Saylor's bod, Corrigan unfortunately doesn't get the same treatment from Donner's lens. Known for his amazing ass, even that isn't prominently on display, with no ass eating and only a few minutes of doggy style before some standard missionary. Corrigan is also known for giving incredible over the top, passionately vocal performances and here, he barely makes a peep. At times his facial expression doesn't even move, he just stares down blankly at what's going on with his hole and then stares up into Saylor's eyes without change. It's unlike him. Regardless, both boys are so stunningly gorgeous and Donner captures the moment so beautifully that it's still way above average.

Barrett Long and Mason Wyler's scene is without a doubt the highlight of the movie. A pairing that should've happened long ago, Wyler takes Long's dick gleefully and Long is completely present for the moment. Fully hard, fully thrusting, fully penetrating and talking down to Wyler like he's his bitch, we've rarely seen Barrett Long so animated -- nor have we often seen Wyler so totally speechless as he gets his mouth and his ass hole stretched the max. If there had been a moment of what Wyler's hole looked like afterwards, I'd have thought Dink Flamingo himself had directed it!

Unlike past features from Dirty Bird where the best scenes have been from the amateur boys of Active Duty, the porn stars featured in the aforementioned scenes make up the best of The Porne Ultimatum. Active Duty boys Levi and Kasey fucking Colin is hot enough, but per usual, would be a lot hotter if someone like Flamingo was telling them what to do as opposed to them going through the motions on their own. (Straight, gay for pay, whatever the hell you want to call them... they need someone explicitly telling them what to do or they don't feel comfortable making the move themselves and won't make the effort to.) Porn star Brant Moore joins another amateur Seth in a three-way with Kaden Saylor, but this as well is just overly chatoic to the point that if you're fast forwarding (and who isn't while watching gay porn?), you won't really know who is even fucking who. It just seems like a mish mosh of close up face shots and penetration -- and when there's three people, that's not so good.

The final scene pairs Saylor with Mason Wyler. The two of them together make for a nice ending, but it's anti-climatic after Wyler's previous bottom fest.

The introduction of Kaden Saylor, the amazingly bottomless bottom that is Mason Wyler, one of the most energetic scenes from Barrett Long ever and really anything with Brent Corrigan is always worth the buy. Grab it!

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WATCH IT NOW!: Dirty Bird Pictures' The Porne Ultimatum is now playing online in the JC Theatre!